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The Final Summer

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Newsletter The Final Summer! by Esther on 24 September 2026 Happy Autumn! I look forward to the cooler weather and a slower pace of life ahead. This summer has been busy. A majority of it is just work banter, of which I shall not bore you. Between hopping between places and working on my own projects, I somehow got a lot done and nothing at the same time. This summer, I officially started looking into what I might want to do next year. I hope as application deadlines approach to create something fun to track all the possibilities. Currently, I have most of my hopes on an opportunity that has ≤12% chance of acceptance. Probably not the wisest choice, but I suppose I like to try my luck at times. I still have to wrap my head around the fact that I am living the present and actively sorting out something a year out at the same time. It feels weird because the last time I did this, I had a guaranteed thing I would be doing, and now… I am kind of gambling without the security of what I hav...
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Finding Normal

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Newsletter Finding Normal! by Esther on 23 June 2026 This quarter was the first time in a long time where I am beginning to feel like myself again. I am still rather hesitant to go places alone, but I have found a few spots in town I feel confident enough to go whenever I need to get out of the house. I never expected my life to go from being able to go anywhere I wanted to needing to be accompanied full time all because I returned to the states. Yeah for those that are not aware, a month into my return, I received my first set of threats, and now I am basically living a weird “I don’t exist but I do” kind of life. Trust me, this weird dynamic has only made me miss Lithuania more which has affected my transition back to the stateside of things. I am glad though that through friends, I have been able to find a few places and things I enjoy as I figure out who I am in this new and messed up version of normal. So what have I been up to lately? Well, I bring this episode a bit late becaus...
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What to do?

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Newsletter What to do? by Esther on 28 March 2026 I write this newsletter late because the truth is, I question 1) what I should write about and 2) how often I should write. When I first began my newsletters before I began to back them up on the blog site, they were monthly emails to my former grade eight math teacher. I got word she would share the email with my other teachers, so I looped them in the email, but after she left and another teacher’s email got hacked, I made them public for easier access. The entire intention from them was to help friends of mine get updated on what was happening in my life, but now I cannot continue doing the old format. A year ago, a major event happened in my life, and I never realized how that event would alter my life. I do not think it is appropriate to explain the situation in my newsletters, but since then what I could share about my life instantly became extremely filtered. The reality of the situation is that many of my friends are not even a...
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Holiday Homesickness

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Newsletter Holiday Homesickness! by Esther on 18 December 2025 Another term finished and another year almost over; oh, how the time goes by. Since the start of my newsletters, winter holidays meant looking forward to passing the time with the kiddos and the family, but this year is different. The once looked forward to the time where post finals meant playing with the kids and Papa taking us to ice skate is officially over. One has to wonder how one person's life choices changes everything for everyone. It reminds me to cherish being in the moment more when around the people we love(d). That said, old habits we once took for granted do not stop one from creating new memories with new routines. This term was a first for me in everything as I felt like I was establishing my life in the states from scratch. My academics changed, my social life changed, and I stepped foot into a public middle school for the first time, just to name a few major things impacted. I have never felt more o...
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Not Home

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  Newsletter Not Home! by Esther on 18 September 2025 For those asking me if I am home, the question I ask back is “what is home?” My mother warned me that I would have a hard time coming home, but neither of us prepared for the reality that awaited me. Up to the day I flew out, I thought I would go to Lithuania, enjoy my time there, come back to the states in summer, and it would be straight back to work, seeing my kiddos, and preparing for the term ahead. But from 8000km away, little could I have imagined just how wrong I would be. Before it is all gloom and doom, I will do a recap on my Baltic adventures. I had a lovely time being able to reconnect with old friends and meet new ones. When I first arrived, my friend’s mother picked me up at the Trakai railway station, and well, Trakai became home for me instantly. Before the tourist season began, it was always such a peaceful thing to enjoy the outdoors by the lakes. Being outdoors a lot made any day better, which really came in...
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That Aged Well

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Newsletter That Aged Well! by Esther on 16 June 2025 I will not lie, the last newsletter was written on the date it was so that I could contain something happening a few days later in this letter. However, that planning also worked out a lot better given what all has happened following my last update. Just as I thought life was calming down, new lemons were given to me. Most days I was living in both Lithuania and U.S. at the same time. Sad news first, my boss and her husband need prayers. They are getting a divorce, but the divorce has escalated into something more than it needed to be. The part that pains me most is knowing that the kiddos (three under eight) are being dragged through this whole mess, and I am not there to comfort them. Since the early days of being a teenager, I knew I wanted to be there for the kiddos. Knowing I am over 8000 km away from them sucks, but it has also taught me that I can protect them through other means. This issue alone has only added to the reason...
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